I Have A Charlie.

I have become addicted to The Pioneer Woman, who, unless you live in a cave, is rocking the blog world. She is funny, humble, a great cook, lives on a ranch with Marlboro Man, and home schools her four 'punks' as she calls them. I live part time vicariously through her.

And she has Charlie, the Basset Hound. Who I'm guessing is as complicated as my Owen, third in The Sled Team. So this post is hard to write but I am facing the possibility of having to find Owen a new home.

We just had another vicious dog fight, between Owen and the Scottie Abner, who is injured from the fight and I just can't handle the drama that this adds to my life.

And, oh, I love this dog. I thought it would be toughest on M2 to have to let him go but its gonna be me. But Abner is my original dog, and he does not complicate my life like Owen does. Owen is demanding, adorable, loud, silly, emotional, funny, and the list goes on and on.

What I am hoping is a Basset Hound lover, that maybe comes over here from there (I'm going to try to link this post over there somewhere)

will write and tell me they have been looking for a 2 year old male Basset, who they would love and brush and give lots of treats to because I just can't think of anyone but the best family taking him.

Help me out by forwarding this if you can; as you can tell, we live in Dallas, but I would drive him to a good home, pretty much anywhere.

LYG

Bj

Set Me Free, Why Don't Cha Babe

Ok, so I wake up at 5 am and sort out my latest weird dream. I had thought that when Super D and I were chased by two gorillas last week, and we had to barricade the door with furniture to keep them out, that was going to do me for a while in the what the hell was that category.

Oh no.

Last nights Dream Theatre starred Diana Ross. And there she was, or should I say HAIR she was, with hair the size of Rhode Island, pearls, dressed in white and floating around the room. So I'm listening to the conversation going on, and she said 'do you know I am the second richest woman in the world, just behind Oprah?' and everyone oooohed and aaaahed and I thought 'do you know how broke I am right now?' but just smiled and secretly thought how I had never bought any of her music, nor was it on my IPOD. I mean, she's ok, but I don't have a thing for Elvis either, so if they are your faves, sorry, but I'm a Rolling Stones kind of girl.

ANyway, M2 appears and walks up to me and says 'do you mind if I go live with Diana Ross for a while?' and then I woke up. And I laid there.

And I went to my mental ditch, as I've named it, at 5 am, and thought about Christmas coming and presents and unemployment and fa la

la f-in la. Now I'm really not liking Diana Ross, for rubbing it in AND stealing my kid.

So a few hours later, I talk to a close friend and tell her I am going to make a phone call to someone, really suck it up, and ask that person if he would possibly be the donor of a Wii to M2 for Christmas. Yes, that is all she wants. I know, we are two years behind the entire population, but no we don't have one. But M2 said 'maybe I could ask for gift cards and put them together and buy one' and by God, I thought, I'll move mountains, sell a kidney, whatever it takes to get one for you for Christmas. (Can I get an Amen from all the Mothers who know when the Mama Bear comes out, and you must take care of the cubs?). And my cub is good, and humbled by our situation, and caring, and doesn't ask for much. Believe me, I am around kids her age that think it is there RIGHT to have all the latest material things, and I am thankful for mine who doesn't ask for much at all.

But my friend says "I got the Wii covered". And I am horrified that the conversation went THERE instead of her just backing me up on the phone call I was going to make. We talked a long time, she wouldn't take no for an answer, and as I write this it is already waiting for me at a store to pick up.

Can you believe it?

Suck it Diana Ross. I have friends that, although they are not dressed in white, and float around the room, they are Angels to me. And THAT is MY Christmas present, to have them in my life.

LYHolidazeGuts,

Bj

First I went here, then I went there....

doing a little blog hopping to see whats new and funny out there, I went back to The Blogess and from her site went over to The Onion. This was a news story posted over there.

American Muslims To Fort Hood Shooter: 'Thanks A Lot, Asshole'
November 12, 2009
FORT HOOD, TX—Following Army psychologist Nidal Malik Hasan's shooting rampage on the Fort Hood military base last week that left 13 people dead and 30 others injured, fellow Muslims across the nation sent him a message today, saying "thanks a fucking bunch, asshole," to the 39-year-old killer. "Hey, great, eight years of progress right down the shitter," St. Cloud, MN resident Zahida Naseem said at one of dozens of impromptu rallies held nationwide. "And you just had to scream 'Allahu Akbar' while you did it, didn't you? May as well have put on a turban and rode a fucking camel right through the army base, you dick. Thanks for making the foreseeable future a living hell for normal, peace-loving Muslims in this country. Really appreciate it!" American Sikhs are also reportedly enraged with Hasan, and an official statement from the National Sikh Heritage Center read, in part, "look, we got nothing to do with that guy."

that pretty much probably sums it up how most of the American Muslim population feels. Well and the non Muslims too, just another weird tragic thing in our world.....

On a different note, can someone help a sista out? I forgot how to do the strike out word thing that LV taught me, and also, how do you highlight other blogs that you are writing about?

Or please send me the manual Blogging for Dummies. Because I'm busy hoarding Eggo Waffles.

LYFridayGuts,

Bj

Colonel Mustard In The Library With The Candlestick

Hello! Guess I've licked my wounds long enough, swept up the confetti from the pity party, and decided I should really share today's (dog) events.

I rushed home with groceries today, with just enough time to put away the cold stuff, and in a hurry to get out the door to pick up M2 from tennis practice. Even made time to feed the sled team so they weren't pretending they were dying by the time we got home, because I really hate the drama and the guilt they are heaping on me if they think I'm 30 minutes late feeding them. Anyhoo, we get home and SOMEDOG has eaten three tomatoes and half a loaf of sourdough bread.

Lets review the suspects:

Abner- the small badass Scottie would not even THINK of doing this so he is always immediately off the hook

Bella- challenged and not usually the first one I point the finger at

Owen- the Basset that ALWAYS has a look of 'What?' on his face and tries his best to be his cutest when I am cleaning up after the dog party that has taken place in my absence.

So I do the 'shame on you' to the group, clean up whats left laying around and I'm done. An hour goes by and I hear a weird noise, and its Bella.

Beginning to puke. And she does, once, in the shape of a brain

(sorry-at least there are no pictures), then again, then the grand finale. In the shape of Florida. And its not like I TRY to name those shapes of puke, it was just so obvious right at that moment.

After I finish cleaning up Florida, I SWEAR Owen has the most indignant look on his face, like 'Really? Does someone owe me an apology?' and I'm thinking to myself 'dude, you probably told her to whip you up some Bruschetta and look where it got her.'

Seriously, I am like the poster child for Laminate flooring.

Soon, very soon.

LYmaybeIshouldconsiderconcretefloorsGuts,

Bj

Carry On.

Well..................

Just got 'the email'. They know I'm a great fit, but with 'this economy',

they will not fill the position until January.

So, if I'm MIA for a while, I'm either-

-applying for foodstamps

-busy selling things on Craigs List

-finding a good street corner.

-joining the circus.

Really, I do know the 'its not meant to be' factor. And I believe all of that, and also appreciate your good thoughts. Keep sending them our way.

LYG,

Bj